Thursday, September 28, 2006

Whose Idea Was This?

I have spent a good amount of my time the past two days . . . . . . sewing.

Read that again. Sewing.

I'm sewing clothes for my daughters' dolls. This is what I do when my mother-in-law is visiting. It is sometthing we can do together. It is one of the few things that she can do better than me. She feels good about teaching me something new and fantasizes about me making more and more things when she isn't visiting.

That won't happen. I have other things I like to do much more than sewing. It's so . . .

so . . .

so . . . domestic. So housewifey. And although I am a housewife in the old fashioned terminology, I don't want anyone to think I'm typical. I'm more likely to be teaching my kids about physics, or insects, or the chemistry of cooking than sewing something.

Well, I have sewn every window dressing in our house. I also made the dog bed, and our Christmas stockings, and the kid-sized aprons. Hell, I guess I am a bit typical and domestic.

My real reason for posting was to ask about you and your in-laws or other family member. Is there some activity that creates a neutral ground? Because, for my MIL and I, it is sewing. Phill even said that we were cackling together. And, that's good for us. I'm not usually so relaxed around her.


Genevieve said...

I have never been very comfortable with my mother-in-law for various reasons. I probably imagine some of them, and others are definitely real. I hope somehow I can build a better relationship with my daughter-in-law (when I get one) than I've had with my mother-in-law.

wolfbaby said...

My MIL and I have some issues because she is trying to replace my mom.. it drives me bonkers.. but since i have let her teach me to sew she has melowed out considerably... which in turn helps me to hold onto my temper... sewing is a good thing;)

Kuky said...

It's funny. I don't think of sewing as domestic or housewifey. I see it as crafty. So when you say you are a bit typical, I don't think so.

And to your question. Nope we don't have any activity that creates neutral ground. Alan's mom speaks Tagalog a lot and we don't seem to have anything in common.

turtle toes said...

I am very fortunate in the MIL department. She treats me like a daughter without trying to be my mother.

Kell said...

You may be domestic - but you're not typical... And domestic doesn't sound bad to me at all!

Sarabeth said...

Wolfbaby--I remember when my husband's parents alarmed me by calling me their daughter. I told Phill, "Why are they calling me that? I have parents. I'm not their daughter!" I didn't say it very nicely at all. I was incensed.

Of course, as I often say, I was in the full bloom/arrogance/stupidity of youth and failed to consider their point of view. Having had only one child this way their chance of having another child--a daughter--to influence and teach and share life's joys.

Trixie said...

For MIL and I, it is baking. Not cooking but specifically BAKING and only in relation to holiday goodies. Oh wait, we also have this thing about flowers. We could look at flowering plants (particularly those which produce nice cut flowers) all day.

So there you have it: baking and flowers. {We also love foot rubs and smut novels.}

My FIL and I don't have anything by way of a shared interest. We tried to enjoy gardening together and this one adventure will be the Holy Grail of my memories about him. Unfortunately he is a louse and thus we have no other memories worth sharing.

the granola said...

I actually don't mind sewing, if I'm in the mood. But then, the only things I usually sew are costumes. I made Arwen's riding outfit for myself once. Made my daughter an elven warrior costume from the Helm's Deep scene. My poor five year old (at the time) had no choice, she was Frodo one year.

I don't like to show my MIL what I sew. She's too critical about things. I'd hoped to get something that could be common ground. I tried scrapbooking, since she is nuts about pictures. She refused because she would be embarrassed about her english. Then she moped about being lonely.

Cooking was okay, but more of a "I can cook my son's favorites".

We can watch modern romantic comedies together. There we go.